THE COUNTING GAME


This game relies on rotten puns, sometimes slurred pronunciations, homonyms, and a gentle disregard for the exact form of plurals or indeed spellings. It's easiest to start with parrots:

One parrot? Monopoly (mono-polly)

Two parrots? Duopoly

Three parrots? Tripoli

but there are plenty of others

Four small parasites on rodents? Quadratics (quad rat ticks)

500% price rise? Pentecost

Six people who are no longer there? Hexagon (gone)

Seven glowing ashes? September

Eight cats? Octopus

Having ten teeth? Decadent

Ten speeches? Decorations

As you can see, you can use any language for counting, as long as the other person knows or is likely to know the language, or if you have a dictionary hand (including online):

One Russian friend? Paladin (pal + Russian for "one", adin)

One fluorescent tube? Satellite (Malay for "one", satu, + light)

Nine of anything is quite difficult: my favourite is:

Nine Maltese noblemen? Disappears (disgha, Maltese for "nine", is pronounced more or less "deesa", + "peers")

You can also add qualifiers and confusers:

Three massive sticks of chewing gum? Tridentine (as in Latin mass + Dentyne chewing gum)

Twenty US cents? Paradigms (pair-a-dimes) 


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Words and pictures copyright (c) Roger Hicks 2016